drowning in air

by retrodiction

Right now i’m in a bad place. Heading down a dark road. Regressing to old habits.
“Have i hit rock bottom?” was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. I’m supposed to be heading back up the murky waters by now. The dark waters with little to no light shining on it. No one can see the flailing off my hands or hear the shortness of my breaths. I try so hard to keep my head above the waters. I do. Now i mock my own contradicting thoughts. I can’t be my own prince charming. How can i?